OK, if you have been in prayer about and feel that God is still calling you to the ministry, it comes time to prepare and circulate your PIF. How do you address what happened at your last church?
I think you should be honest about it, saying things did not work out and explaining why you think it was the case. Also, let prospective PNCs and COMs know what you think you have learned and can learn from the experience.
And when I say "be honest," don't afraid to list your accomplishments, either! There is something worthwhile in even the worst calls. I was able to affirm some good things about the ministry I did at my last church.
If at all possible, get some references who experienced your situation first hand and have stood by you. I was incredibly blessed by the support I received from some congregation leaders. That made a big difference. I was just as blessed to have the church's previous pastor on my side. He most graciously served as a reference for me and helped out a lot. He lasted longer than I did at our mutual church, but he encountered some awful situations, some of which I also experienced. I was amazed that some of the very same people, and the very same tactics, used against me were also used against him. It made me feel both sick and relieved ... sick, because my colleague went through some really hard times, but also relieved, because I could understand it was not really about me, but about the congregation.
I have found that nost PNCs, COMs and EPs appreciate honesty and self-reflection from a pastor, so they will not automatically rule you out because your last call ended badly. However, I also must state that the EP and COM of ONE Presbytery treated me very poorly, as if I were a prisoner before the parole board, rather than a colleague in ministry. If you want to know more, email me privately. I would counsel anyone who has had a difficult last call, AND is theologically and politically conservative, to avoid that particular Presbytery. I just experience its culture as very negative.
This was not entirely an issue of ideology, because I have had excellent conversations and relationships with colleagues all over the map. But, whether liberal or conservative, there are folks in the system who exercise control and domination, and behave most ungraciously. Beware of that wherever you go.
4 comments:
This is an excellent series. I went through a horrible experience in my first church where I was for five years. I too was foolish about conflicts and self-blinding about negative signs. Though most of the congregation was supportive, the power was in the hands of some dyfuctional people whom my predecesser feared. Good for the church the negative people left before I did, but presbytery insisted that I leave, though the people that were left did not want this. I was "lucky" to land an interim in a church that was very healing, but got in a rut of interims and "temp" things, and thought I would never get out of it, but I have been in my present church for 18 years; a church that probably called me because it was desperate but it seems to have been a good fit after all.
John - Remembering all of the great conversations we had while you were a student at PTS. Thanks for sharing this part of your journey.
I appreciate this series. I also resonate with much of what you are writing, as I also had a call "end badly." In my case, many things were going great and there was a lot of promise for the future, but I underestimated the determination of some people to be destructive, and I didn't give enough credence to the reality of "the powers of this dark world and...the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms" (Ephesians 6:12). I'm glad that you found another call relatively soon. That doesn't always happen.
In Christ's Peace!
Thank you gentlemen for your affirming comments ... there will be more to come. I am glad this is helpful to you.
And Jeff, great to see you, hope you are doing well. God bless!
John
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